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2021 Q1 Accountability & Spring Queen Challenge | MaeveMadden

2021 Q1 Accountability & Spring Queen Challenge


  • Hi everyone

    Although I have been following Maeve for years now on Instagram, I just gathered the courage to sign up here and for her spring queen challenge. I am going to get way out of my comfort zone with this post and the before pictures. However, I have been told to practice things that make me get out of my comfort zone to help with my anxiety so here goes and forgive me if it is too much personal information.

    I mentioned in a comment already but my goal for this challenge is mainly a mental one. As for many, 2020 has been quite a bad year for my mental health. Unfortunately, the timing of a traumatic breakup and miscarriage of an unplanned pregnancy coincided with the first lockdown, so 2020 won against me at that point. However, over time, especially during the summer, I did find that exercising more again helped me slowly climb out of clinical depression. I used to be a pro volleyball player so my body is used to training 2-3 times a day but due to knee injuries and a broken leg a few years ago, my fitness has been slowly diminishing. I think I am still generally fit and due to my height/metabolism I haven't put on a lot of weight but I can still feel and tell the difference between how I am and how I looked/felt a few years ago, which coupled with everything that happened this year made me feel even worse about myself.

    So my main goal is to set a healthy routine over the next three months, in the first quarter of 2021. I would like to try to do some form of exercise every day to manage my anxiety while also become happier with my own body (and accept the changes that have happened to it since I stopped being an athlete). Although setting 7 workouts (including yoga/stretching before bed) a week as a goal might be ambitious, I think it will help a lot.

    To that end and to make myself more accountable, here are my before photos which were taken this morning (before and after this morning's workout). Excuse the quality and the lightning - I think I need to practice taking more photos of myself over the next three months 😳. 

    I think I will try to upload progress photos every couple of weeks. How often do you guys take them?

    I am very excited to try the workouts every day. This morning's workout was amazing and although I was super nervous and I did the beginner version of most of the exercises due to my knee, I felt really proud of myself for completing the workout with everyone.

    I am still getting used to 'being a queen'; I think it is hard to think of myself as one at the moment but maybe being able to call myself a queen 👑 will be an indication of feeling better in terms of my anxiety and self-esteem. I am really looking forward to the next few months and working out with all of you!

    I can already feel that walking tomorrow will be interesting after this one: 

     



  • Yvett, you should be so damn proud of yourself for 1. sharing your story and 2. committing to yourself to embrace exercise, it's literally life when we let it into our lives 😊 

    So much respect for you ✊🏻 enjoy every moment on this journey, you are doing this for you ☀️❤️

    It was my first live this morning, a big accomplishment and I loved it 😊🌈💫

     

    Shine bright Queen 👑❤️


  • Sorry to hear about your losses with relationship and mc Yvett. The losses are heartbreaking and I can't imagine how tough the last few mths have been. 

    Fair play to you for putting measures in place to help your health and mind xx 

    I suffered from a few losses before I had my daughter and I never realised how grief can creep up so definitely exercise and support from the queens will keep you feeling the 💕

    This year is what we will make of it and Maeve and the queens saved me during first lock down and I've made friends this year through us all wanting the same things x


  • Thank you @Orla Byrne and @Vicky Baker! I always find it hard to start sharing but once I do, I always feel much better! 

    I just finished this morning's Sweaty 7's. Unfortunately, due to a work call, I could not join live but I actually quite enjoyed doing a workout during my lunch break. Feel more awake now.


  • @Yvett Talas ❤️❤️❤️. U r one strong queen, don't ever forget that doll. Plus u have over 2500 more queens with u every step of the way.  👑 👑 👑 ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ 


  • First-week update:

    7/7: I feel really proud of myself for doing something every day, with most days doing more than one workout. I feel slightly more stable mentally and had no panic attacks this week. I had a dip around Thursday/Friday but I think that was more to do with just general work stress and the lockdown hitting me. I had to do the beginner version of some of the exercises due to my knee but I still felt like I have worked hard. Overall, feeling a bit stronger mentally and physically, and so excited for the weeks to come. This morning's yoga class was just what I (and my body) needed. I cannot wait to have a long bath tonight to give my muscles a little break though!

    I really liked the combat class on Tuesday and the barre ballet class on Wednesday. I am used to doing strength and conditioning with weights so it was lovely to try something so different. The barre ballet class reminded me of doing ballet as a kid and made me miss it so much. I felt really feminine as well doing it - I am 6ft and quite athletic looking so don't feel feminine in general but that class made me feel like a ballerina.


  • @Yvett Talas Heya Queen so so happy that u had such a successful week. U really gave it ur all. Well done Yvett, u're killing it doll. Try not to let work get to u if u can Queen, ur health is way more important. How amazing was Combat Queens & omg Barre ballet was another level altogether wasn't it. I know what u mean about feeling like a ballerina. I'm. 5ft1inch but I wldnt b the best in the coordination department but because Barre Ballet is much slower it gives me a chance to do the moves more smoothly & daintly. And I wld never have said I was anywhere near dainty 🤣🤣. Looking forward to our new instructor coming on board. Anyway I hope this week is going well for u Yvett. Take care & mind urself Queen 👑 👑 👑 ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ 


  • @Yvett Talas that's brilliant Yvett 👍 hard to believe we are almost finished week 2. Time is flying. Keep the chin up. I totally get you on work stress..the last few mths of work took over completely and I found it so hard to juggle. I was so envious of everyone who was able to do 1 or 2 workouts every day but I just stayed consistent and patient and over time it all adds up xx you're doing great 


  • @Audrey Browne @Vicky Baker Hope you are both having a lovely week and thank you for your lovely messages!

    I know what you mean Audrey - I would definitely not be graceful at all if Barre Ballet was faster. I am still not graceful half the time but at least in my head I am 😉💃 (I am sure my neighbours love the show through my windows during the class. I am excited for the new instructor and to try out her style! It is so nice mixing them - they are all amazing yet slightly different which makes the workouts so much fun.

    Vicky - I completely agree, it's all about consistency and life does get in the way. Time flies so fast - I feel like January is almost over! I do feel like times goes faster during lockdowns.

    I am having a really strange week. It was all going well then I had to work super late on Tuesday and woke up feeling very nauseous on Wednesday. Since then I have been really nauseous and been having bad headaches. I am not sure what it is as I do not have any symptoms of COVID but I ordered a test just in case. It could be maybe food poisoning but I am not actually throwing up or any of that - it is a mystery haha. I keep telling people it is not morning sickness 🤣 there are a lot of pre-requisites missing for that. However, this is how I imagine what morning sickness is like. I told my mum that I hope she gave me her good genes because she did not have much morning sickness during her two pregnancies, and I don't want to feel like this for months in the future...

    I had to take yesterday off from workouts because I thought a day off would help. The good news is that yesterday I could feel the benefit of doing something every day as even though I was stressed about work and just about feeling sick in general, I was very stable and my anxiety did not kick in. Also, the only times I am not nauseous is when I am eating or when I do a workout. So this must mean that the queen workouts are helping me get better 🤞👑💪 just did Perky Peach from this morning - feeling the burn now.

    It is so interesting how I was completely fine during the workout and now that I stopped, I am feeling nauseous again. Have you girls come across anything like this before?


  • Belated Week 2 update: 6/7 days of exercise which is not too bad considering how awful I felt last week. 

    Definitely feeling stronger 💪. Combat and barre ballet are still my favourites but I do really enjoy the Monday morning sessions as well.


  • Yass @Yvett Talas for coming out the other side of all you've been through you are a queen of queens! Well done for recognising you needed a change and making small steps to help you get back on track. If you ever need to chat I and I'm sure the other beautiful queens are around. Good luck 👸👑


  • @Yvett Talas oh Queen I hope u're feeling better. I've bn having that nauseated feeling also for the last week & half so much so I actually cldnt really eat last wk just snacking like mad. Covid free but I do know there is more flu flying around. Will we ever get over it. Im so glad that u r loving the workouts & so so happy that they r helping with u with any stress that u may have. I love the happy buzz I get from our workouts.

    Week 2. Queen u r smashing in fairness to u. Whooohooo I love it. Yes they r some of my fav classes also 😍😍😍💪. Have the most amazing Week 3 Yvett 👑👑👑❤️❤️❤️


  • Thank you @Audrey Browne it might be flu! I did the COVID home test and found out today that it was negative so at least that's good news. My mum suggested that I make a big batch of vegetable soup and try to eat that for a few days. It helped me a lot last weekend! Still feeling a bit queasy today but no more headaches. I could work properly and do the workouts I planned 🎉 I am just going to focus on each day this week and see how it goes.

    @Megan Hunter 🤗 baby steps, one day at a time. Hope you are well!

    Hope you both have a lovely week as well! So excited about the new classes 👑♥️


  • @Yvett Talas Well done Yvett good to hear things are starting to come together xx

    @Audrey Browne hope u feel better soon hun xxx


  • @Yvett Talas heya Queen hope u're feeling better 👑👑👑❤️❤️❤️


  • Week 3 and Week 4 updates: 6/7 both weeks. I felt really good in terms of workouts for the past two weeks. Not so good otherwise - just had no motivation to do anything else apart from sleep, eat, work and exercise. I know that's more than enough these days but I am getting more and more frustrated with every day being the same. I have been re-reading the same trilogy for the third time now. I really like the books and they give me comfort. I kind of want to re-read them for the forth time but that thought makes me feel a bit crazy.

    Then, my physio delivered the news last Friday: I am not allowed to do anything with my lower body apart from just moving around in the flat for a few weeks until the swelling goes down from my knee. No combat queen, no barre ballet, no perky peach....it didn't really hit me until today. I am going to try to substitute the workouts with previous pilates and arms workouts from the library but I cannot help feeling very down about missing my favourite workouts for weeks. Working my upper body has never given the rush that other workouts have so I am scared that I won't be able to keep up the motivation to exercise. The swelling is gradually going down but I have a feeling that even after it is gone, the physio won't let me properly workout for ages...

    I know that it is for my own good and I am trying to follow the advice as I haven't properly rested my knee before but it has really kicked me down the ladder and feeling my anxiety flaring up again. I know that I have done this to myself by not resting before and now I probably made the recovery much longer. Just feeling generally really shit and then I think about how there are people out there who have less than me and maybe cannot move at all, then the guilt kicks in.

    I had an MRI on Saturday though so hopefully that will give me some answers...

    I haven't done photos since the first week so I thought I would take them this morning to see the progress. I cannot really tell myself, I think it's my anxiety and depression talking, where it does not let me like my body. I just feel really puffy and big all the time. Seeing the photos here help me actually try to see myself objectively. There is definitely still progress to be made in terms of my photo-taking skills... I just find it really awkward standing straight with a timer on my camera. Any tips on how to get more comfortable about taking photos of yourself?

     


  • Haven't really posted an update here since I was told that I need to take a break from doing anything lower body related. 
    I have been trying to do the upper body and Pilates classes every week, which have kept me hanging on to the little sanity I have left. Sweaty 7s and Arms and Abs on Saturdays have been my new go-to exercises. 
    However, I just do not have the same kind of motivation when I don't do lower body exercises. I really miss Combat queens and barre ballet and the Monday morning classes 😭 I did not realise how much they have made me feel alive in January. 
    The swelling on my knee has gone down and I have been doing physiotherapy but it has been a very slow process. I also received the results of the MRI today, which were not great...I am waiting to discuss them with the physiotherapist and I guess a doctor but seeing words like significant, severe degradation, worst stage, I just want to hide in my bed and never come out. Tomorrow, however, is another day and I will try to keep as positive as possible in the current circumstances. 
    I have not taken any photos of myself to see any changes because I just cannot bear to look at my body right now. It is fascinating how easily you can put on weight when you are restricted in the amount of exercise you can do. I know it doesn't matter because the most important thing is that I am alive and healthy otherwise but it just seems to be an endless circle for my depression. 
    I feel like my knee has failed me and I have failed this spring challenge in terms of a transformation. I was mostly looking forward to the mental transformation as I know that my body will probably take a bit longer. So, I think I am just more disappointed in myself for not being mentally stronger and being able to do all the classes.  
    However, I am very grateful for Maeve building this community and allowing us to experience all the lovely classes. I think I am just going to have to accept the setback and focus on being able to do the classes I miss so much in a few weeks/months/who knows when. 

    I have been following everyone else's progress on the Forum and so proud of everyone. It is cheering me up and giving me hope that hopefully once I have a full treatment plan and my knee is fixed as much as possible, I will be able to be as strong as all of you are and have a wonderful mental transformation. 


  • @Yvett Talas Heya Queen, I'm so sorry & sad to hear that u r still struggling with ur knee. I know how upsetting this must b for u. But remember u r strong u will get through this. Ur health & well being is so much more important. Ur MRI results r what u wanted to hear but there will be solutions this will get sorted. I know u r listening to ur body & that will stand to ur healing process  But u will get there Yvett & ull come back fighting even harder. Be very proud of how far u have come Queen. We're here for u doll. Pls keep us updated Queen 👑 👑 👑 ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ 


  • @Audrey Browne your message just made me cry 😭 in a good way though! Thank you for your lovely words. I talked to a family friend who is a surgeon today to go through my options earlier today. I am hoping to get an appointment with a specialist consultant in the coming weeks. The only real option is surgery but it is a very complicated one and it would potentially take 1-2 years for it to fully heal but in my head maybe losing 1-2 years now would be worth it if it meant I could have the next 60 pain free and not having to worry about having a knee replacement when I get older. 
    A lot of decision to make over the coming weeks and months. 

    In the meantime, it is lovely to see all the progress you have all been making. I am not making those gains but still feeling very proud!


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